Headline Competition

JournalistWCC’s precursor World Cup Hippo ran a mildly popular predict the headline competition for the last World Cup.

We are therefore asking our readership to devise some possible newspaper headlines which might adorn the back pages this summer. To set the tone, we’ve kicked off with a couple of examples below. Please leave your entries (and a little explanatory text if required) in the comments box.

Hand of Drog
Roo Beauty
Chile Gone Barmy
Let’s Go Foul a Kuyt
New Zealand suffer half-Nelsen [Ryan Nelsen is sent off just before half-time]

This entry was posted in Student Union. Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Headline Competition

  1. Shaken Not Stirred says:

    “William The Conqueror” – Gallas shines as France lift trophy for the second time.

    “The Good, the bad and the ugly” – Clint Dempsey scores in both ends and gets sent off inside the first twenty minutes of game vs Algeria.

    “Heinze variety” – Argentina utility man willing to play anywhere to fulfill world cup dream.

  2. David Painter says:

    Daylight Robben-ry

    In? Yes! Ta! (Iniesta scores the type of goal which sparks endless debate about goal-line technology)

    Give it some Hart! (Robert Green has a poor game against USA)

    Park Benched (South Korea’s captain controversially subbed)

  3. The Sound of Shoelaces says:

    Didier do well! – Drogba scores hat trick and celebrates with Bruce Forsyth impression.
    Messi in a Bottle – Lionel bottles his decisive penalty
    Yobo lowblow KOs Pozo – Everton’s Joseph Yobo hits Argentinian ‘keeper Diego Pozo in the swingers.
    Koren have a go if you think you’re hard enough – Robert Koren takes a pop at a player.
    Spector haunts England – Johnathon Spector scores against England
    Dozy Altidore – Jozy makes a blunder

  4. Isambard Milutinovic says:

    Beam Me Up Scotti – (Uruguayan defender)
    Forlan Star
    Lionel Blur
    French Toast
    Argy Bargy
    Park and Ride
    Greek Tragedy
    Hart Ache for James
    Upson Downs for England
    King Ledley the First
    Frank You Very Much
    Fabio Says SWP RSVP ASAP
    Roo-Hoo
    Chasin’ Donovan
    Stars and Tripe
    Yankee Doddle
    Algeria Reach Their Nadir (Belhadj)
    Too Klose for Comfort
    Lahm Chopped
    Harry Harry
    Neill Down
    Mrda Inquiry
    We’re Ghana Win the Cup
    Ooijer Trying to Kid?
    De Jong and Winding Road
    De Zeeuw Keeper
    Kuyt-rageous
    Agger Do Do Do
    Kvist and Shout
    I Got You Abe (plays for Japan)
    Matsui Blows a Fuse
    Rigobert On Song
    Italy Grab a Pizza the Action
    Santana Hits the Right Note for Paraguay
    All White on the Night for Kiwis
    The Killen Fields
    Barron Sees Red
    Miami Weiss
    Lucio in the Sky With Diamonds
    Grafite Removed
    Brazil Do Nothing By ‘Alves

  5. David Painter says:

    Crouchy Tiger’s Hidden Flagon (Crouch dropping following booze scandal)

    Steven Pinot Noir (Pienaar dropped following booze scandal)

    England in deep Shittu

    Roon River (Wayne turns on the waterworks Gasciogne style)

    Seven Samaras

    Gold Medel

    Dirty Sanchez

    Grella Load of This!

    Art Deco

    Pienaar Nee-Na (Steven Pienaar is arrested following booze scandal)

    The Shittu hits the fan

    Bafana Bafana skin

    Lahm to the slaughter

  6. Robbie JasDay says:

    Trochowski’s Nutcracker
    How Low Can You Go (Joachim Low tries to psyche out Fabio Capello)
    Muller Light
    Klose Call
    Tired Clichy
    Fit for a King
    Let’s Kvist Again
    Silence of the Lumbs
    Cor Vidal!
    The Green Green Pass of Groan (Robert Green clears straight to an opposition forward – who scores)
    Every cloud has a Silva lining
    Hiho Silva
    Cesar Salad

  7. Mark says:

    I’m going for
    “One in emile-ion” for when Emile Heskey scores the winning goal to take England into the final.

  8. Stattoz points out that in the 3 minute Nike commercial at about 1:08 in there is a cutaway to a newspaper front page with the headline “England in Roo-ins” and wonders if the writers intended to predict both a failure of nerve by Rooney and a defeat in R16 inflicted the Socceroos.

  9. Alberto Rosso says:

    ^^inflicted by the Socceroos.^^

  10. Thomas Blane says:

    “Torrible to Torrific”
    For Torres to change his poor world cup into a dream after scoring the winning goal for Spain in the final