Even though I know they’re no good for me,
It’s the risk I take for the chemistry. Alexandra Burke
Pain and pleasure are apparently at opposite ends of the emotional spectrum. Pain makes us feel bad, pleasure makes us feel good: these should therefore be non-overlapping phenomena. If pain makes somebody feel good, then this might be considered contradictory or perverse. Masochism is the term used to describe the experience of enjoying pain, humiliation or disappointment.
The human brain has gone through a complex evolutionary process which actually means that pleasure and pain are not mutually exclusive cognitive categories. Sexual selection means that it makes sense for individuals to strive for the highest quality partner available. This is so that their offspring will contain genes from a fit and healthy partner, which means that their own genes will have greater likelihood of surviving through the generations.
The only difficulty of pursuing a mate who contains high quality genes is that this person will be extensively sought after. An individual who has acquired an alpha partner is presented with substantial risk of this partner leaving them or engaging in sexual liaisons with others. The chance of rejection is also higher in the first instance, as a popular individual can select from a broad pool of potential partners. There is thus significant risk attached to pursuing and retaining a highly regarded partner. As has been recognized though, those who secure these partners will be attaining the best survival chances for their own offspring. There is, therefore, a selective advantage conferred by masochism: those who could derive an endorphin rush from the disappointments of pursuing and maintaining a relationship with an alpha partner were more likely to pass their genes through the generations. Masochism is therefore an adaptation to the emotional risks which are taken when pursuing the best future for our own genes.
We can therefore now see that the almost joyous frustration and tears which are forthcoming when England lose are quite rational in terms of evolutionary psychology. As the striving for sexual success is an inextricable element of our being, masochism has become a more generalized disposition and applies to the pursuit of other triumphs. Masochism enables failure to be endured as it actually generates pleasure from this defeat. Those who are likely to persist with a course of action which might lead to success (such as following a middling team in an international football tournament) are those who can also endure the disappointments of failure. Because our distant cave-dwelling ancestor got into an endorphin-soaked lather over an aloof stunner in a loincloth, we now enjoy stomping up and down and crying when England are humbled at a major tournament.
Masochism is thus one of the reasons why England fans can continue to watch the team despite 44 years of hurt. Our national team represents us personally, so self-flagellation in defeat is an enjoyable pastime when a World Cup bid ends in failure. There is a certain pleasure to be derived from watching England fail in humiliating fashion, as Pearce, Waddle, Southgate or Batty fire tame or misplaced penalties towards (or not towards) the goal.
However, whilst masochism may be a functional cognitive corollary of striving, it becomes dysfunctional when it becomes a replacement for striving. In life, disappointment is always lurking as a probable outcome, so we may seek out and revel in pain because it provides an easier and more certain route to an endorphin rush than steady progress towards achievement. For example, a masochistic English public has the media it deserves. The England team had the broad support of the public and media throughout a convincing and successful qualification campaign. But when World Cup year arrived it has provided much better copy to pontificate over players’ personal problems – to such a degree that it is likely to impact negatively on the team’s performance in South Africa.