I might not know Art, but I know what I like

Everybody knows what constitutes a good goal! A shot from distance, a lengthy sequence of passes, a mazy dribble or some acrobatic contortions…However, football, like art, isn’t merely about technical excellence, but about the emotions it stirs in fans and players across the globe. The worlds of Football and Art nearly collided in 1994 when Eric Cantona was nominated (but not considered) for the Turner prize, for his “three dimensional propulsion of a spherical ballistic into a limited receptacle”. But what are the more intangible qualities that differentiate the pedestrian from the exhilarating?

Here are a few of my favourite footballing accompaniments that fire the brain’s pleasure neurons. The goals they accompany were brilliant, but it is because of these additional flourishes that they became firmly lodged in the head of this football fan.

The crossbar/goal-line/roof-of-the-net triumvirate

The explosion of power, the kineticism of the ricochet and the extra, tantalising, split-second where you are not sure the ball has crossed the goal line until it hits the roof of the net. The Guardian’s Rob Smyth describes it as “the best pre-goal foreplay a man can experience” which I think sums it up pretty nicely.

If you ask any football fan who grew up in the 90s about these types of goals, they will usually all mention the same player – Tony Yeboah, who in 95/96, hit two blistering examples, one against Liverpool and this Goal of the Season winner against Wimbledon:

Tony Yeboah scoring against Wimbledon in 95/96

Lobs/chips that land on the goal-line

Lobs, chips, lofted volleys etc all take a deftness of touch and appliance of skill that is as much about confidence and assuredness as it is about technique. So when a shot that has been deliberately lofted over the goalkeeper lands on the goal line, it sends a statement. A statement that says, “I had the whole goal at my disposal and I didn’t even need it. I could have lobbed you in a 5-a-side goal.”

Here’s Brazilian goal-scoring legend Romario providing an excellent example, lobbing the Real Sociedad ‘keeper with the full 7ft of the goal height to spare:

Romario lobbing the Real Sociedad goalkeeper

Goals where the ball rolls across the back of the net

Hard to describe this one – these are the shots that are hit with force and at some indefinable angle, so that they don’t just hit the back of the net, they roll around in it, dance across it, adding an extra slice of dynamism, the proverbial cherry on top of a powerful finish.

Here’s Michael Owen hitting an unsaveable penalty against Argentina in 1998, with the ball gliding across the underside of the roof of the net, before depositing itself at the feet of the thoroughly beaten Carlos Roa:

Michael Owen converting a penalty in the 1998 shoot out against Argentina

Do you have any footballing je ne sais quoi that add an extra bit of spice to a goal? Let us know in the comments.